So I am on my second night at the University of Illinois, Urbana Champaign, in the rotting shit-hole that is known as Sherman Halls - this place is terrible. I have been running the water in the shower for almost a half hour now, and it's only reached a temperature that is about 20 degrees below zero. The staff here at Sherman assure me that it will heat up in time - I had to ask today because after being driven off by the icy water yesterday I have begun to smell a bit ripe. Add to my misery the fact that I am swimming in 86% humidity at a temperature that is even higher; every surface of my little cell is covered with a nasty film of condensation and, from the looks of it, decades of ramen juice and a random assortment of bodily fluids. I'd wear shorts to cool off, but I'm afraid I'm going to get crabs from the computer chair.
The 'linens' provided - two white drop cloths with suspicious stains the desk swears came from an errant pack of koolaide that made it into the wash, and a fuzzy blanket that I don't think was meant to be fuzzy - provide inadequate protection from either the damp chill of 3am nor whatever lurks on the mattress with me.
If you thought that things couldn't get any better at this luxury hotel of mine, the internet is wonderfully slow, and they kindly wake you up at 6:15am with a pointless fire alarm in the middle of thunderstorms. Ah dorm life - how grand.
Now I'm off to check the water temp again; with any luck it'll be to the liking of any reasonable Polar Bear Club member or someone desperate enough to rid themselves of swamp ass.
Sweet dreams...
Not Goodbye, but See Ya Later
1 year ago
2 comments:
that sounds way worse than my college dorm, thank gawd. just keep telling yourself: totally temporary.
Two week temporary though... I'm going to go postal on someone if the fire alarms go off again tomorrow morning.
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