Overheard at the Sox game

In true, uninspired, ripoff fashion, today's entry deals with funny things I heard at the White Sox/Pirates game last night (sox trounced the Pirates 16-5). So, without further ado - here are the sounds of the game:

Man: "It still kind of hurts when it touches where I had my third nipple burned off."

Mother to child in bathroom stall with automatic toilet: "{FLUSH} Don't get up, it's not going to take you with it!"

High-pitched woman's voice: "GOOOOO CREEEEDEEEEEE!!! YEAAAH! CREEEDEEEE {pause} "Let's..." {Pause - whispers} "Who's up now?" {shouts} "YEAAAAH LET'S GO CREEEDEEEEE!!!!"

High pitched woman's voice #2: "GOOOO CUBBIES!!!!!"*
*note - Cubs were not involved in the game this was shouted repeatedly at

High pitched woman's voice #2 again: "Hey - FUCK YOU A.J.!!!! I LOVE MICHAEL BARRETT!!!" repeated many times, even when AJ was not on the field.

Man - "Isn't heckling Pirates fans like bullying the fat kid in grade school?/isn't it bad enough they're Pirates fans?"

{after a 3 run homerun} High pitched woman's voice #2 again: "WHITE SOX SUCK!!!"

That's right Ozzie - to the drunken trixies of the world, no matter what we do, we'll always be "the bitch of Chicago."

Special note, high pitched woman's voice #2 was escorted out by her very embarrassed boyfriend after repeated requests from both him and other members of the crowd for her to shut up failed. Though the Sox were at that point winning by a 10 run lead, they apparently still sucked, as did the Sox fans because they refused to stand throughout the Sox at bats like they do 'at Wrigley." Oh well, we'll try harder for you next time you visit, sweets. Until then, I think I'd rather not force the shorter people and children behind me to stare at my back rather than the playing field. Can't please everyone!

No comments: